This week has made me reassess what I need to do with my time in order to stay sane.
I've been thinking it for a while but really it took four consecutive days of doing the exact same thing for me to realise that in order to be happy and stimulated I need to plan more in advance. I guess if I plan it will also help me budget how much money I'm going to need and when!
So after four days getting up, getting dressed and getting Effie ready then going to sit at my mums house and watch tv/read magazines/chat. I'd had enough. Don't get me wrong, my mum has been my life saver so far since becoming a mum but I think that we've been spending far too much time together and that time doesn't feel like quality anymore, just quantity.
So Friday I got ready as usual and instead of driving to my mums I drive to the local town and went shopping. Normal right? But not so easy with a little one, I used to love my own company before having a baby but I think I've been afraid of it since I had her. The what ifs are endless, what if she starts crying somewhere awkward, what if she needs a nappy change and I can't find a changing room, blah blah blah.
It was the best day! Effie sat smiling at me from her buggy, we wandered around just enjoying being outside together. I changed her and breast fed her in pleasant surroundings (thank you m&s), I had lunch in costa whilst Effie played with my extra long spoon and then had her bottle. I spent my entire budget on stuff for the kids, typical!!
It made me feel happier about getting out and doing things. I am certain there will be the nightmare day where everything goes wrong but living in fear of that day isn't mentally stimulating me or Effie. So on Saturday instead of the normal everyday boring chores we went to the park, as a family. The sun was shining for the first time in ages and it was blissful.
Spurred on by my successful days I enrolled for sing and sign to help Effie communicate with us and to meet more people. Doesn't start until April but it's something to look forward to. I looked at water babies classes but it's quite expensive so I'm vowing to take Effie swimming once a week, she only manages half an hour but she loves it and is usually so tired afterwards I get a peaceful afternoon whilst she sleeps! And we start lazy daisy wrigglers on Monday, following the tinies course we did last term.
More planning needed but it's a good start and the mental realisation that I need to get out and be independent again is a turning point.